Stockholm was colder than I imagined. Despite the fact it was early summertime my first task was to go and buy a summer jacket, since all I’d brought with me were t-shirts. I crossed through the marketplace outside the operahouse and turned left onto drottninggattan, Stockholm’s main shopping street. What I seen before me was nothing short of sublime. Stunning women were everywhere. Icey blue eyes and blonde hair, with heavenly hips swaying towards me and passing me by. It was mesmerising.
The promised land was here. I had arrived.
I smiled a mischievous knowing smile to myself as though I’d just learnt a big secret that nobody else knew but me. As I walked along the row of shops I began to count how many beautiful girls there were. One. Three. Six. Eight. All within five minutes. ‘Guys here have got a made,’ I whispered to myself.
When I got to a zara clothes store I was about to walk inside when an incredible ethereal looking blonde caught my eye. Now or never. I began walking towards her while munching on a bag of almonds. I’d discovered that eating at the same time as approaching helped to alleviate anxiety. It tricks your brain into thinking you’re safe. As cavemen we would only eat when we knew there were no outside threats. Plus, I think chomping on a bag of nuts helps to promote a more nonchalant image.
“Hey, you’re Swedish? You look so… Swedish.”
She took a deep breath and I watched as her eyes lit up. Then she turned her head to look downwards coyly. I smiled, threw a couple more almonds in my gob but didn’t say anything.
She looked back up, “Where are you from?”
“Newcastle, in England. You ever been to the UK?”
“Yes, once. I loved it there.”
“Yeah? Did you eat fish and chips and get your picture taken in a red telephone box?” This soon became my standard response anytime a girl told me she had been to England.
She told me her name was Sara and we chatted briefly for a few more minutes before swapping Facebook details.
Afterward I walked into the shop grinning from ear to ear. I was so happy it would take plastic surgery to remove the smile off my face. The checkout girl probably thought I was on drugs.
Ten minutes later I seen an olive skinned girl with a Hollywood smile and tight formal trousers. I began to walk after her to pick the right moment, get by her side and say hi, but just as I was about to tap her on the shoulder a well dressed, straight faced guy jumped in front of her and I began to recoil. Did he know her? Had they arranged to meet? Maybe he was a daygamer?
I decided stand back and watch. They stood in the same spot chatting for what seemed like ages before they began to walk together.
Carefully, I followed, like a man in the forest walking past twenty sleeping bears. I kept a close proximity but not far enough away that I would lose them. ‘Jack Glover, private detective for hire,’ I laughed to myself, it was something I’d considered as an occupation and would go on to trying one day.
I kept following them both down the main street, we walked down two or three blocks before finally they stopped, gave each other a hug and said goodbye.
I waited a moment while deciding exactly what to say, then caught up to him.
“Excuse me, can I just ask you something… Have you heard of pick-up artists.”
It was the only thing I could think to ask at the time.
His hands moved to his hips as he leaned back and laughed loudly, “Yes, I know what pick-up artists are.” He replied.
“Cool, so you are out doing daygame?”
“Yeah, my summer holidays have just started from university, I’m getting some practise in while I have plenty of time. You’re british and visiting here I take it?”
“Yeah, I’m here for two weeks, would be great to hang out with you if it’s ok?”
“Yeah yeah, of course, come on let’s walk toward the centre, we’re to far from the foot traffic here.”
I immediately noticed his strong frame and dominant leadership.
“I’m Jack.”
“Erik.” His vice like grip almost broke my hand. I imagined his ancestors as steely conquering Vikings.
“So have you been daygaming long?” I asked.
“I’m up to around two hundred and fifty approaches, but I want to get to five hundred by the end of summer, which I think is easily managable. You?”
“I just a started a few months ago, I was only meeting girls in bars and clubs before that.”
“Uk is good for meeting girls from nightgame?”
“Yeah, I meet a lot of girls from bars, but I’m starting to get sick of the club’s, and the noise, and I’d prefer not drinking so much. I want to get good at daygame now instead.”
“Excellent. So why Stockholm?”
“Why not! Look at this place, there are gorgeous women everywhere!”
His hands moved towards his hips again as he leaned back to let out another bellowing laugh. Five seconds later he ran off to catch a middle eastern looking girl before returning after a minute or so.
“Boyfriend.” He muttered.
“You don’t go for Swedish looking girls?”
“Yeah I do, but I prefer the arabian look and their bigger asses. Hey look, these guys are daygamers.”
He stopped to point to a tall guy who was stood leaning so far back that his crotch was almost touching the girl’s belly button despite their heads being a comfortable distance apart. His wing stood close by in a bright yellow t-shirt, he had a shaved head and the wrong skin tone to be scandinavian. When he spotted us close by his expression changed quizzically.
“Hey man, you’re Erik right, we met once before.”
I winced as I watched his hand get pulverised.
“Ahh yeah, I remember. How’s things going? This is Jack, here’s here on vacation.”
“Good to meet you bro. I’m Sam. Hey I’ll introduce you guys to Sebastian as soon as soon as he’s finished in set.”
“She looks interested.” I commented, and nodded to the girl that was stood smiling playfully.
“Yeah yeah, it seems like it. Oh, so you’re British? Cool cool.”
Once Sebastian came to join us there was a brief conversation in Swedish and we said our goodbye’s. Outside of earshot Erik turned to me, “That guy is a machine, I always see him out doing daygame. The tall one I mean.”
“They both seemed like cool guys. Everyone I’ve met through this ‘pick-up community’ has been pretty cool actually, I’m kinda surprised”
We continued to walk along the urban city streets and then I noticed her. Long flowing black hair, curves in all the right places and the kind of big dazzling eyes that made her look like a Disney princess. I felt adrenaline pump through me like I’d just been electrocuted. Erik was busy doing his hip, lean, laugh, and didn’t notice as I slipped away. My heart was beating like an innocent man on death row but I was so captivated by the girls beauty that I barely even noticed. Her facial features were like a tractor beam pulling me in helplessly.
“Excuse me, do you know where the opera house is?” I was so nervous to talk to her I didn’t dare be direct in telling her that she was quite possibly the prettiest girl I’d ever seen.
“Oh, hi, erm, opera house? I’m not even sure there is one?” Her accent was American, and as she looked into my eyes, I felt my bottom lip tremble from anxiety like it had those few years ago.
“Yeah, it’s around here somewhere, a big blue building I think, near a fruit market?”
“Oh, oh, I know where you mean, you need to walk up this street until you reach the main road and then go right and you’ll see it.”
“You’re beautiful.” I felt the words leave my mouth without realising and then cringed as my whole body tensed for her reaction.
Her eyebrows shot up faster than oil prices. “Oh my God, thank you so much,” she said as her cheeks flushed and her eyes darted from side to side, “Where are you from, are you Australian?”
“No I’m English, and you’re… American?”
“Actually I’m Syrian, but I grew up in California until I was nine and then my family moved here.”
“So you can speak Swedish?”
“Of course I can speak Swedish,” she giggled. It was the most adorable laugh I’d ever heard.
“Erm, yeah, I should have guessed.” The voice inside my head told me to stop saying stupid shit. “So, you’re out shopping?”
Doh!
“Yeah, my mom gave me money to go buy a dress for our end of term ball but I can’t find anything.”
I tried to block out images of how amazing she would look in an elegant dress, “So you’ve just finished college?”
“Yep, start university early next year but I can’t decide what to do yet, maybe dentistry.”
“A dentist? …but you look like a model,”
Doh!
“You’re joking, I have dwarf proportions.”
Her sense of humour made me melt. She was pure perfection, and so I told her so, “No you don’t, you’re perfect,” she blushed again, “well I guess I should let you continue your shopping trip, but I’d really like to see you again.”
“Yeah that would be nice.” I noticed the freckles on her nose, and the way her lips curled up at the sides when she smiled. I felt a delirious sense of love chemicals wash over me.
When I walked back to Erik with Jenaya’s number his usually straight face had turned into a smug grin, “Damn, I’m jealous, she was great.”
I had an adrenaline dump, my whole body suddenly felt exhausted and I simply replied, “I know.”
The next day I met Erik again, just like before he was immaculately dressed, in fact, almost all Swedish guys seem to be immaculately dressed. Chinos with white and blue striped shirts seemed to be the favourite attire. We walked to an Espresso House coffee shop for him to grab a coffee while I stood outside looking to do my first approach of the day. Life felt great. Jenaya had been responsive on the texts. We arranged to meet two nights later. A part of me didn’t want to talk to girls anymore incase as if by some amazing coincidence she happened to walk past and see me taking another girls number. Her pegging me as some kind of player would have been the last thing I would have wanted, but that was the life I was living, no matter how hard I tried to convince myself otherwise. My usual rationalisation would be that players are guys that sleep around but PRETEND they’re in a monogamous relationship. Whereas I prided myself on explaining to a girl that I was not looking for something serious, that way if she stuck around afterward then everything is understood and I’m still the good guy. Was I really still the good guy? I’ve never been able to decide. Girls would still get attached and then hurt when I admitted to being promiscuous. There is a fine line between a good guy and being a player so perhaps I’ve always been stood right on that line?
We walked through norrmalmstorg square, the posh area of Stockholm’s city centre. We passed by the building where the infamous ‘Stockholm Syndrome’ phrase was coined. A bank robber holed himself up with the hostages, who after spending three days together began to think of him more as a friend rather than an enemy. When he finally gave himself up, the hostages surrounded him as he exited the bank so that he wouldn’t come to any harm by the police. I educated Erik about the whole story until he spotted a Shilpa Shetty lookalike and disappeared while I continued talking to thin air.
I took a seat on a bench to close my eyes for a moment. To reflect on what all of this was leading too, and to enjoy the feeling of a warmer summers day than the day before as the rays touched my skin.
“Hey bro, how you doin?”
I opened my eyes and seen Sam stood in front of me, one of the daygamers from the previous day. He’d changed out of the yellow t-shirt, and was stood with a different guy.
“This is Obie, by the way, are you alone?”
I shook Obie’s hand, “Hi. Jack. No, I’m with Erik again but it seems like he’s been gone a while. Sebastian not out today?”
“He’s taking a day off for once in his life. Hey if Erik’s on an instant date then come game with us.”
Sam’s welcoming manner made him extremely likable, but when I looked at Obie he seemed a little more suspicious of me. I wondered whether he’d genuinely be keen on the idea of me joining them.
Fuck it.
“Yeah sure, I’ll come with you guys for a bit, I’ll message Erik as we walk and he can always come join us after I guess.”
“Cool bro, cool. How are you liking Stockholm so far?”
“This place is great, I met a really sweet girl yesterday who I’m having a date with tomorrow, I’m looking forward to it.”
“Yeah? That’s awesome. Obie has a date with a Russian girl tomorrow also.”
I look over to Obie and he simply nodded.
“You like Russian girls?” I asked.
“Yeah, I prefer to try to meet tourists or girls that moved here from other countries. I’m not really a fan of the Swedish look.” He replied.
As we walked together in the sunshine Obie began to open up more. For the first time in a long time I felt a strong sense of brotherhood. Making such great friends was never on the agenda when I made the decision to get good at meeting girls in the daytime, but that decision was turning out to be a great one. The feeling of being challenged and growing on a daily basis felt so great. Each day was like a new adventure.
After an hour we all swapped numbers and I branched off to go find Erik.
He seemed extremely happy about the great instant date he had. I shared his enthusiasm, excitedly looking forward to having an instant date of my own hopefully sometime soon.
All thoughts of an instant date with anybody else flew out the window when 7pm the next day rolled around. I’d arranged to meet Jenaya on the bridge that led to Gamla Stan, Stockholm’s old town. I arrived five minutes late and she was nowhere to be seen. I started to pace up and down the bridge thinking she might be at one end and then the other. Then it dawned on me, ‘There’s a second bridge. Shit! There’s a second bridge and now she’s probably left and gone home.’ I ran to the adjacent bridge around three hundred metres away and found her stood waiting while looking forlornly at the floor.
“Hey! I’m sorry, I was stood on the wrong bridge.”
“Oh, ok, I did wonder whether you would show.” She said with that adorable smile.
She wore black knee high boots over the top of tight white jeans and a sexy leather jacket. I never thought it possible but she looked even better than when we met on Drottninggatan.
I suggested we go to a quaint park I’d found with a great view of the city and she happily agreed. To get there we had to walk through the old town and past the Slussen subway station. As a quirky detour I showed her the ‘Little Iron Boy’ sculpture that’s tucked away down a narrow alley behind the royal palace. Legend says that if you rub his head and leave him a sweet or some money then you can make a wish that will come true.
I slipped a coin into her hand and ushered her to make her wish. In my head I was making a wish of my own. A wish that she wishes that I like her.
After giving his head a little pat she looked up at me and nodded. I smiled back and took her hand, “Come on, it’s this way.”
When my fingers touched hers, warm tingling sensations ran through my whole body. My biology was telling me something. It was telling me there was chemistry. Real natural chemistry and not to fuck it up. Which made me more likely to fuck it up, but when we got to the park things were miraculously still running smoothly. We found a perfect bench to sit on as the sun began it’s descent.
When we sat I could feel her leg press up against mine as she leaned in towards me. It done nothing but increase my attraction for her. I started to feel like a thirteen year old with a high school crush, it felt great.
We sat and chatted about anything and everything. The more she opened up the more I was bowled over by not only her humour but her intelligence too. She was beginning to seem almost to perfect.
After the park I walked her to the subway station and we kissed goodbye, it was somewhere between a small kiss and a make-out, but felt like just the right amount to be left mysteriously wanting more for both of us.
An hour later she messaged saying she had a nice time. A smile enveloped my whole face while my heart skipped a beat. I felt delirious.
When James arrived from the Uk, two sentences immediately left my mouth, “Hello mate, hope you had a good flight,” and, “I’ve met an amazing girl.”
He smiled politely and responded politely, “Yeah? Tell me about her.”
At which point I proceeded to tell him every detail of how we met and the most interesting things we talked about. He continued to smile but I couldn’t help wondering if he was smiling because he was pleased for me and enjoying the story, or if he was just excited to be on holiday. Regardless, I carried on yapping away until I’d squeezed out the last drop of information, including a full description of the moment we kissed. He definitely looked bored by that point. I change the topic, “Is there any specific thing you want to do, or place you want to visit while you’re here?” I asked.
“Nope, just the city centre for lots and lots of daygame.” He replied.
A feeling of initial dread ran through me. I started to panic a lot more at the idea of daygaming every day with the risk of Jenaya walking past at any moment and seeing me chatting up girls in the street in the exact same way I did with her. Guys in the pick-up community would call this a scarcity mindset. Which it is, but then isn’t it natural to worry about losing something precious once you’ve found it? Despite learning the skills and developing confidence to be better with women I was fully aware of how infrequently you meet a girl of high value that has the right chemistry to match your own.
I ushered those thoughts to the back of my mind and reminded myself that I didn’t start this whole daygame journey just to fall for the first pretty girl that showed an interest. But then perhaps that was the whole point. I couldn’t decide. I was confused and love blinded.
Eventually I conclusively decided to continue daygaming. It would be stupid not too after just one date with a girl, and realistically I had no idea whether she actually felt the same.
We took the subway to the south of the city and checked into our twin room at a hotel for the night. That hotel offered an amazing buffet breakfast. I had breakfast at the Bellagio once in Las Vegas. This breakfast was even better. They had every possible thing you could think of to put in your belly on a morning.
After our fill we went into the city. James was happy to meet other wings so later that day we met Sam and Obie. I still made some approaches, but I consciously made them cautiously in the less busy areas of the city where I thought Jenaya would least likely see me. It was such a fun day that every one of us was ‘in state’ as Bodi had said.
The next day I trepidatiously asked James whether he’d be willing to make himself scarce for a few hours on the night as I’d persuaded Jenaya to come share some wine with me at the hotel.
He was more than happy to comply. He told me he was considering taking a look around the old town anyway.
“Perfect!” I smiled.
When the evening time came I agreed to meet Jenaya at gullmarsplan subway station, where we took a tram to the hotel. She seemed happy enough to go drink wine in the room rather than the hotel bar, which pleased me. Not just because things were more likely to escalate sexually there, but simply because it would be more comfortable. We would be able to focus on each other rather than guests coming in and out the bar area distracting our attention.
I opened a bottle of wine and we started discussing music. She educated me on a British band that I hadn’t heard. I put them on YouTube for us to listen too. I figured having music playing that you know a girl likes is most helpful to get her to relax, and I could see Jenaya was tense. Her hands were in her lap with her finger ends twiddling together while her shoulders were pointing upwards at the chandelier. Since she was perched on the edge of the bed I suggested she lay down. Timidly she lowered herself until her head rested on the pillow, and then we were kissing. Properly kissing. With passion and tongues. But her body still felt more rigid than the eiffel tower.
“It’s ok, we don’t have to do anything if you don’t want too.” I said. Desperately hoping she wouldn’t agree to it but still preferring she just felt comfortable.
“No, it’s ok, I kinda knew what coming to the hotel would entail, it’s just… it’s just…” her fingers started twiddling more than ever, while her eyes began to look wildly around the room, “…it’s just…”
“You’re a virgin?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh, ok. Well it’s fine, we can just chill.”
“Well, no, I mean, I want too, but…”
“You’re nervous?”
“Yeah, and you know, this is kinda all new to me.”
“Its ok, I understand.” I offered a kind smile in an attempt to subliminally let her know she was safe. We began kissing again. I started to escalate things slowly, unsure about whether I even wanted to take this girls virginity on a second date. Then I reasoned with myself that maybe it was better this way than some young dumb guy that would probably just selfishly take what he wanted without showing her the gentle consideration this kind of scenario needed.
Soon enough we were semi naked. I revealed her large perfect breasts that she had stealthily kept covered during our time together.
I was harder than ever.
All of our clothes came off. Then just as I began to enter her consummate this mutual attraction she had second thoughts.
I insisted it was cool if her mind had changed. I could tell she was worried about whether I was disappointed.
I was disappointed. I was also ok about it though. I could see things from her perspective. We had fun together and even if I had never seen her again I would have still felt we made the right choice.
We laughed and joked around in bed and it was fine that the sex didn’t properly happen. Just being around her felt fulfilling. Was I fooling myself?
Eventually I walked her back to the tram stop. Along the way I noticed I physically could not stop leaning into her and touching her. ‘A side effect from the sex not happening?’ I wondered.
We kissed goodbye. She waved from the tram and then she was gone.
When I returned to the hotel James was sat on the breakfast bar of the hotel ploughing five chocolate shortbreads into his mouth.
“These biscuits are great.”